Name : loveyunjaeyoosu / dkdbsk
Story Title :Love me
Fanfic URL :http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/loveyunjaeyoosu/
Reviewer : for3v3r
Title: 2/5
“Love Me” is a very common title so I can’t give you very high marks for this section.
Poster/Background: 8/10
I love the poster, it is very simple but brings out the feel of the story.
Forewords: 6/10
It is not very well done. Forewords are meant to give the readers of an idea what the story is talking about. However, you did not talk about the story at all. You only give the description of the characters which I don’t think is need because the readers can find out about it as they read through the story.
Plot: 10/15
The plot is quite interesting with Yunho acting as a child etc. I like the way you present the idea, good job on that.
Creativity/Originality: 7/10
I have seen stories about killing others, it’s quite common.
Flow: 7/10
It’s all right but some of the sentences do not make sense.
Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: 6/10
You need to brush up on your grammar. The moment I read your first chapter, I don’t feel like continuing to read because of the grammar. Everything is in past tense in the first few lines. Although your tense is in past tense in the later chapters, it is best if you could maintain it throughout. I can see that you are trying to create sentence variety here but it is not very successful. I would advise you to only write the sentence when you are confident of it. Take note of your spelling, I spot a few spelling errors.
Characterisation: 6/10
You did not describe the characters’ feelings and actions very well
Writing Style: 6/10
You are writing a story not a script.
Overall Enjoyment: 2/5
Frankly speaking, I don’t enjoy your story very much.
Bonus: 2/5
I am afraid I can’t give you any bonus marks except for the poster.
Total: 62/100
Don’t be discouraged by the harsh comments I give. Continue writing, trust me, you will improve.
