Author: Riz-2611
Fanfic URL : http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/riz04
Status : One-Shot (Completed)
Reviewer: Khlaren @ Mystery-Cious
Title: 5/5
-A perfect score because it’s a very interesting title and it matched the story from start to end.
Poster/Background: 6/10
-I originally gave you 4 points but added two points because you did your own poster. Your poster is okay but I didn’t like it, honestly. The color green doesn’t match your poster as a whole and it’s somehow disconcerting. I also didn’t like your background for it only has the words promise tree.
Forewords: 7/10
-I like your forewords but it was really hard to understand
Plot: 8/15
-I have read a lot of stories with the same plot, childhood friends; one of them left and one was left behind. But it’s still very interesting because of the promise tree. What I didn’t like though is that, half of the story was only flashbacks.
Creativity/Originality: 7/10
-The story isn’t original. But you still managed to make it appealing because of the things that happened.
Flow: 5/10
-I didn’t like it that it was full of flashbacks. Everything happened too fast.
Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: 3/10
-I don’t like giving low grades when it comes to grammar but you seriously need help with your English. I almost did not understand the story because of your grammar. I admire you for admitting that you’re not good in English and because you’re willing to let readers tell you if you have mistakes unlike other writers who get mad when people correct them. You have to check your tenses critically because it could confuse readers. It’s okay to have mistakes because I do have mistakes too especially when it comes to tenses. Just write and practice more, you’ll do better next time!
Characterization: 7/10
-You have described Ella and Chun properly. I have a problem about Ella’s character though. Ella’s supposed to be mature but when she fought with Charlene, her immaturity showed. Plus, she left just because of Chun, it’s not a very mature thing to do.
Writing Style: 5/10
-Widen your vocabulary. And stop writing too many flashbacks because it’s confusing. If you can make something happen without a flashback then do it. It’s not a crime to write flashbacks, just don’t write too much.
Overall Enjoyment: 2/5
-I enjoyed reading the story but I didn’t understand some parts because of the grammatical errors.
Bonus: 4/5
- For doing your best even if you don’t know English too much.
Total: 59/100
